Month: January 2023

Sexpert/

Sexy Valentine’s Day Ideas for your Man

Alexa, play Something in Common by Bobby Brown & Whitney Houston

Every year, Valentine’s Day is portrayed as a woman’s holiday. The pink, the red, the heart shaped chocolates.

I have never seen a commercial or an ad telling me I should get my man a gift to show my appreciation for him.

Valentine’s day is a celebration of love and romance and not with any specific gender. St. Valentine, the man responsible for this holiday, married all types of couples. He married people who couldn’t marry because the leader at the time thought married couples distracted them from being a strong soldier.

It’s 2022 and the last time I checked, there are 13 million female entrepreneurs and still counting in the US alone. AKA we should share the pressure to showing our love for each other on Valentine’s Day. It’s only fair.

So for this Valentine’s Day, we are going to switch it up. Forget the goo goo ga ga lovey dovey stuff and restaurant reservations. I’m going to tell you how you can change up this holiday by making it interesting and sexy for everyone involved. Thank me later.

Fuck his Face

Yep, I’m getting straight to it. Think about it, men love getting their dick sucked especially if they’re being deep throated. If you are someone with a vagina, fuck your partner’s face with with it. You don’t have to lie there and pretend they’re doing a good job, make them do a good job. Try pressing their face against your clit until it’s the right pressure for you. Be in control of your pleasure for a change. Clit owners, get yours this Valentine’s Day!

Grapefruit Technique

Some of you may know about the grapefruit technique from the famous viral video by Auntie Angel or on Girls Trip. If this is new to you, check it out because it will make your day and spike your curiosity. Try the grapefruit technique this Valentine’s day with your partner.

  1. Cut a circle big enough for a hard dick in the middle of the grapefruit.
  2. Before putting the grapefruit on your partner, blindfold him. Tell him to relax. He will not be expecting it which will heighten the moment even more.
  3. Time to get your partner hard. Tease your partner by kissing him on his lips and then slowly make your way down to his dick.
  4. Once he’s hard as a rock, you’ll want to slide the grapefruit on it. He’ll be confused at first but will settle down as soon as you get sucking.
  5. Squeeze, suck, and turn the grapefruit at the same time for an exhilarating experience.

Not only will this be delicious for you but your partner will love it! It’s a win win!

P.S. This does get messy so make sure theres a towel under you.

 
 
 
 
 
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Buy Each Other Sex Toys

Ladies, we love when we get sex toys as a present, get your partner a sex toy for a change! If you don’t see anything you think your partner would use, try getting a couples toy. I suggest going to your local sex shop together and exploring your options. This alone can be a fun activity together. Exploring your sexuality doesn’t have to be so traditional. It can and should be fun!

 

TIANI™ 24k by LELO

Moxie by We-Vibe
Lovehoney Take Control Bondage Kit (10 Piece)
Who is the Fastest Wanker toy?

Who is the Fastest Wanker?

Masturbate with Each Other

If you and your partner are looking for ways to connect on a deeper (pun intended) level, try masturbating with each other this Valentine’s Day. Throw up some porn, smoke some weed, and start touching yourself in front of each other. If you’re not sure how to start this, try touching your partner while touching yourself at the same time. Once you’ve gotten the “okay”, slowly back away and start feeling yourself. Touch yourself as if you were alone. This a great opportunity for you to learn what makes your partner feel good!

Do Something Personal

Do something personal for your partner this Valentine’s Day. Listen to your partner. What does your partner really need? It’s the unexpected presents that mean the most. If your partner has been complaining about being tired from work, offer a massage. If your partner has been talking about self care, go to Sephora and go on a shopping spree. Or put your face on his boxers and make him walk around in it!

My Face Boxer

 

Create an Aphrodisiac Menu

If you need help getting in the mood, try creating an aphrodisiac menu. You can get super creative with this. Set the mood with rose petals, candles, and a sexy outfit (Naked preferred.)

Homesick

List of Aphrodisiacs:

  1. Chocolate
  2. Oysters
  3. Strawberries
  4. Asparagus
  5. Pomegranate
  6. Cinnamon
  7. Sweet Potatoes
  8. Maca
  9. Hot Chillies

Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to involve a typical dinner and heart shaped chocolates. It can be sexy, wild, and full of cum! Remember this holiday is for every body and we should treat it like that.

STAY CURIOUS AND CONTINUE TO EMBRACE YOUR SEXUALITY!

Sexpert/

How to Dirty Talk 101

Oh dirty talking, you’ve got to love it! It’s always something you never thought you would say out loud until you do and you’re like “damn, my pussy is wet. What else can I say?”

Dirty talk can be intimidating, exciting and awkward at first.

Like everything, practice makes perfect. Dirty talk is a great way to intensify things in the bedroom which can lead to better sex and becoming closer to your partner sexually. I believe it brings out a side of ourselves that we never knew was there. It taps into another sexual realm that can be so intense!

If you think you’re ready to talk dirty, here are some tips to get you started.

Figure Out Each Other’s Desires

First things first, figure out what you and your partner are into. What are their turn ons, turn offs, fantasies, desires? Then have a discussion about it. Don’t sleep on communication because that can be sexy too. Imagine knowing what your partner is into and being able to fully satisfy it? HOT.

It’s also important to know what words are forbidden so that you don’t end up killing the mood. For me, the word is “B*tch.” Don’t call me a bitch if you don’t want my pussy to dry up like a vacuum.

If a discussion is off the table, try asking questions during sex. Getting feedback from your partner can be another form of dirty talk. While you’re exploring each others bodies, ask questions like “do you like it when I do this?” “YES! Don’t stop!” “You’re so sexy.”

Confidence

Without confidence your sex talk will sound forced and awkward. I remember when I was starting to talk dirty, I would whisper real low so that they wouldn’t hear it just in case I said something off. You do not want to be in that situation as you will get a lot of “huh?” Not cute. Check out my blog post on confidence and why you need it to be successful at dirty talking.

Be Yourself

Be yourself! It will show if you’re not. It can be possible you’re not the explicit type and you’re more sensual. Try saying what you want to say out loud to yourself and see how it makes you feel. If you cringe, maybe it’s not for you. If you even you want to fuck yourself, then YES! Your partner will appreciate what you’re saying if it’s very “you.” That’s why they fell in love with you in the first place right? For you!

Text It First

Dirty talking is not just for in person. If you’re not ready to talk dirty in person just yet, try texting it first. This will be a great way to find out if your partner is into it too. Use this opportunity to ask questions and tell them how you are feeling so that you can use this information when you get into bed.

Here are some dirty talk phrases to try.

  1. “I want your hard dick in me. “
  2. “ I want you to make me beg for it.”
  3. “ You’re so sexy, I can stare at you all night.”
  4. “ You feel so good”
  5. “ Your pussy/dick feels so good.”
  6. “I want you so bad.”
  7. “ Just like that!”
  8. “ I want to make you cum”

Dirty talking can be a whole different experience in itself. It will tap into feelings you’ve never tapped into before. According to Fatherly.com, “When you feel sexy and empowered and are being creative in your words and imagination, you are more likely to feel comfortable trying new things, asking for what you want, and feeling comfortable with your sexuality,” says Dr. Rachel Needle, a licensed psychologist in West Palm Beach, Florida and the Co-Director of Modern Sex Therapy Institutes. ” Have fun talking dirty!! As long there is consent, I say go for it. Even if it ends up with you guys cracking up. At least you tried.

Stay Sexy & Curious!

Instagram:@Sexishh

That's What She Said/

SEXISH is 3 Years Old! What I learned hosting my First Event

3 years ago I had my first SEXISH event in Brooklyn, NY. My very first event. My baby! It was a huge success in my eyes! All my friends came out to support me and even a couple of strangers made it. It was so much fun to talk about everything sex in a safe space.

Sexish 2019

As much as I want to dwell in the past and talk about how amazing and sexy it was, I want to use this post to tell you what I learned from my first event. I learned a lot of things people don’t tell you about the process- like the emotions and let downs you face. It wasn’t an easy process but it was worth it.

I’m having an event in Chicago this year and it is going to be HUGE. This event is going to be 100x more successful than the first and second one. My dreams are bigger and better! I have new ideas. I have a new mindset. I’m ready, baby!! I’m over the past and ready for the future.

Sexish 2019

What I learned from the first SEXISH event.

Unexpected things will occur but there’s always a solution.

While I was planning this event, I wasn’t really expecting the unexpected to happen to me. I figured I’m doing everything right, what can go wrong? SO MANY THINGS went wrong! Emails didn’t get answered, packages didn’t come in time, locations got cancelled last minute. While disasters are bound to happen, there is always a solution. Let your mind do it’s creative thinking when things go wrong. You’d be surprised what you can come up with when you NEED something done.

Not everyone will believe in your vision and that’s okay.

What I love most about the Universe is that it made everyone so different. It gave everyone on this Earth their own purpose. I used to look at people on Instagram and compare myself all the time. I was so lost trying to figure out how I wanted my brand to look like that I forgot to ask myself what I actually liked. Not what Instagram was telling me what I liked. As soon as I started looking at myself and loving myself, that’s when I knew I was on to something. Trust your vision. It’s yours. Don’t let anyone take it away from you.

There’s a lot of fake people but there’s a lot more real ones.

I’m a New Yorker and I think it’s in my DNA to seek out fake people. There’s a lot of people who will tell you they’ll support you until it comes to actually supporting you. I learned that support doesn’t always mean showing up physically. People can support you through a text, a post, a phone call. Remember those people who showed up because they are the real motherfuckin ones!

Anything is possible when you put your entire focus on it.

Putting your entire focus is not a secret to success. Successful people talk about it all the time. They remove distractions and make their goal a priority. Try it! Try putting your focus on something. Live it, breathe it, be it and watch the details fall into place.

Don’t expect to get respect until you actually do something.

Do you know people who talk about doing something and never actually do it? I was that person once and I always wondered why people weren’t taking me seriously. I was working hard for something, wasn’t that enough? It’s not until you actually do something will people start to respect you. Everyone is doing something in people’s eyes. What makes you different?

RELAX. Trust the process.

Relax! It’s not supposed to be easy. If it were easy, everyone would be doing it. You entered another world when you decided you wanted to do something challenging. The process is different on the other side. It’s the ones who stick to it who succeed.

You only need one person to believe in you.

SEXISH was once just an idea. It stayed an idea for a very long time until I met someone who believed in me. Something was different. It’s like she wanted me to prove to myself that I could do it. Don’t sit around and wait for people to be on board with you. If one person believes in you, I say go for it. People don’t say things just to say things. 

In conclusion, you’re going to go through your own journey and learn your own lessons.

It’s when you discover those lessons on your own when everything will make sense. I promise you it will feel so good when you go after that thing you love. Good luck!

Sexpert/

Ways to Boost your Confidence Before sex

If you ask anyone who is having amazing, drooling, sexy sex what the sexiest thing they find in their partner, I bet they’d answer their CONFIDENCE.

Confidence: (noun) the state of feeling certain about the truth of something.

Confidence is something you need if you want to excel in anything. It’s what sets you apart from everyone else. When you are confident everyone around you feels it. It’s an energy that goes unnoticed. That same confidence applies in the bedroom.

Before I tell you a couple of ways on how to boost your confidence before sex, I suggest that you start with an open communication with your partner about the things that turn both or several of you on. This will allow you to adjust some of the tips below so that it makes sense to your relationship.

Communication doesn’t have to be boring or a turn off. It can be sexy! Try talking dirty, asking questions or try to look out for feedback in the way they move. While I’d love to keep on going with the importance of communication, I’ll save it for later.

Why do you need confidence in the bedroom? If you don’t have confidence, something or your partner will have to compensate for it. Your focus should be on pleasure and connection, not insecurities. Just like you can pose in front of the mirror like a superhero to gain confidence, theres things you can do before sex that can give you the confidence to perform your best.

EXERCISE: Before sex I like to make sure that my body feels and looks plump and ready to go. I like to stand in front of the mirror (preferably a long mirror) and do a couple of sets of squats to get the blood flowing to my glutes. Have you ever heard of being swoll right after the gym? It’s when your body looks plump from lifting heavy. So not only internally will you be feeling amazing but your body will show it. To me, I personally feel great if my ass looks great so squatting is the exercise for me. I’d say to work on your favorite body part right before so that you feel your sexiest.

If you’re not into exercising, try twerking or dancing in front of the mirror. I find that it helps just as much with my confidence. Every time I put on dancehall music and I get real into it, that’s when I feel my sexiest. Doing this before sex will get you ready to go.

PUT ON MAKEUP: I don’t care what men think about when it comes to why women put on makeup but it’s always for us! Sorry not sorry. We know that men have no idea what the purpose of choosing a lighter concealer for under the eyes does for us.

“Putting on makeup is like putting on a pair of high heels. It gives you confidence and makes you feel more in control,” says Sonia Kashuk, makeup artist and founder of Sonia Kashuk Beauty.

The next time you need a confidence boost, try putting on makeup the way you like it. When you have control of what you put on your face, you’ll have control of what you get in the bedroom.

LINGERIE: I was never a lingerie person in the past. I always thought that it would be ripped off my body and it would be a waste. What I didn’t know about wearing lingerie was that I actually like the physical act of someone ripping off the lingerie. Something about it feels so raw, passionate, and sexy.

I love to wear lingerie when I want to surprise my partner. It makes me feel in control when I know what I have on is going to turn his dick out.

For my lingerie, I like to go to Victoria’s Secret, Savage, or I’ll just go to the lingerie section of a store and try to match the closet bra and panty.

PEP TALK: Just like you give yourself a pep talk before making a speech, I give myself a pep talk in the mirror before sex. I like to take an “Issa” moment and remind myself of what a bad ass bish I am! How beautiful I am. How open I am to feel what I’m about to feel. Remember no one can love you as much as you love yourself.

SEND A NAUGHTY TEXT: Another way to boost your confidence before sex is sending your partner a naughty text. Sending a naughty text is a great way to keep your relationship more interesting.

“All relationships require care and maintenance,” Dr. Manly tells Bustle. “When sexual intimacy is nurtured as an important element, the relationship tends to stay very bonded over time.”

This helps my confidence because it makes me feel like I’m in control of the situation. My partner knows when he gets a text from me that I’m feeling sexy and he can’t wait to get home.

MASTURBATE/WATCH PORN : What’s great about porn now a days is that you can find a porn that is for YOU! You no longer have to watch raunchy porn on pornhub or eporner (I still love it 😡 ) . There’s porn that’s made by women and regular people.

Try watching porn and masturbating before sex. When I masturbate, I’m able to let myself go. I feel like I’m preparing my body for pleasure and it feels so sexy! I use this time to love my body and be grateful that I can make myself cum. When you know how to make yourself cum, you won’t have a problem guiding your partner when they need help.

I also love watching porn to keep my sex move toolbox fresh. I love being in front of the mirror and imitating what my favorite pornstar is doing. I love feeling like a pornstar and if that’s how you like to feel too, give that a try. 😉

Glamour has a list of pornsites they think women would like. It’s worth to look at.

Everybody’s definition of sexy is different, so some of these tips might not work for you. Find what makes you sexy and do it. It is worth creating habits that make you feel sexy. It reflects in the real world and in the bedroom.

 
 
 
 
 
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