Author: Sexish Blog

That's What She Said/

When your Partner is Your Best Friend and now you have Separation Anxiety

Is your partner your bestfriend? Mine is! Because my boyfriend has his own business and sometimes he’ll have “light” days, he’ll spend those days with me. Sometimes those days can be consecutive and we spend soo much time together. Every second is the best which makes him going back to work so difficult! There’s times where I feel like a dog waiting for its owner to come back home then snap back to reality to remind myself that I’m an individual and I can enjoy my time without him.

While spending time with your partner is important, it’s also important to have friends outside of your relationship and have your own life. Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean working on yourself and spreading love to other people has to stop. If anything, this will strengthen your relationship as you won’t have to rely on your partner for something that is lacking in your life. You can just go out and get it for yourself.

Remember, being sure of yourself and being confident is a turn on. Work on that!

 
 
 
 
 
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If you’re a submissive like myself, a mantra I like to tell myself is ” I’m submissive in the bedroom and a boss on the outside.”

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That's What She Said/

Random Facts About the Founder

Random facts about the Sexish founder
Founder of Sexish, Theresa Maloco
Founder of Sexish

With Sexish, I want everyone reading to learn something new about themselves. Whether that be they’re curious to try something new, they relate to something, or they discover something they don’t like. Whatever it is, I want you to know that you’re not alone on your sexual journey and you are normal for feeling whatever you are feeling.

I love talking about my sexuality because I feel the more we talk about our experiences the closer we are to having good sex. To make you feel more comfortable with sharing things with me and to your friends, here are random sexual and non sexual things about me!

Remember this is a judge-free zone!

  1. I love to rollerblade.
  2. I enjoy degrading sex. Call me your little cum slut.
  3. I love male attention unless I’m in a room where I’m alone then I don’t feel safe.
  4. I like using sex toys instead of my hands to masturbate.
  5. I only date older men. I love learning from their experiences. It feels like I’m cheating life.
  6. I make out with the hottest girl closet to me when I’m drunk.
  7. I recently stopped smoking weed because it was worsening my anxiety.
  8. I love doing stand-up comedy because I get to talk about sex and be the pervert I am.
  9. I’m a switch. I can be dominant and submissive but I prefer to be submissive.
  10. I like to do my makeup like a pornstar before filming anything in bed.
  11. I prefer to get a brazillian wax instead of shaving. WAX over Sugaring all day. No one tells you how painful sugaring is.
  12. I love romantic comedy movies. I live my life like one.
  13. Fuckbuddy over hookups.
  14. I crochet sexy outfits. Ask me to crochet you something.
  15. I want to be the face of sex for the Asian community.
  16. I have a sexy ass boyfriend who loves how sexy I am.
  17. My dream is to have people come to me when they have questions about sex.
  18. I went to fashion school.
  19. I love self-help books.
  20. I’m so hard on myself when it comes to my work. It’s terrible and I’m working on it.
  21. Therapy has taught me so much about myself and is the reason for my growth.
  22. I love big booties. I can be on Instagram all day scrolling through big butts. I’ve been obsessed with booties since I was in 8th grade.
  23. I love watching scary movies only if I’m watching it with someone else. I can’t watch them alone.
  24. I’m currently trying to make blogging a full-time job.
  25. I sniff my boyfriends hands/body to show how much I love him.
  26. I want to be the sexiest person but I hide it sometimes because I’m scared of what my family will say. I need to remember that this is my story, not theirs.
  27. Google is my GOD. I use it to answer all my questions. “Will I die because a jar of coconut oil fell on my head?”
  28. I’m such a Millennial. I have no patience. I feel I should be rewarded immediately when I do something. I know that’s not how life works. I have to trust the journey.
  29. The word “fart” is funny to me.
  30. I’m working on being more positive. I realized I learned some toxic behaviors from my family.
  31. I love Hamilton the musical, actually I love all musicals! I will jam to it out loud in the car. I don’t care who sees it.
  32. I’ve dated people in the film industry.
  33. I’m normally a social butterfly but after covid I have social anxiety. I’m working on it ASAP.
  34. I was a Dominatrix.
  35. I rather have 1-2 closest friends than a large group of friends.
  36. Every time I pass by a mirror I have to check myself out.
  37. I love working out and taking care of my body. My body is my temple.
  38. I love to eat. I can eat as much at my 6’4 boyfriend.
  39. I eat rice with every meal.
  40. I love sex toys.
  41. I love to masturbate.
  42. I’m proud to be filipino.
  43. I love the beach.
  44. I can’t wait to be rich and wear the craziest outfits.
  45. I love having a partner with the same sexual level as me.
  46. I love older men.
  47. I fart in bed sometimes.
  48. I was a wrestler in highschool.
  49. I carry around lactaid pills because I’m lactose intolerant but I love dairy!
  50. I love whiskey.

Stay Sexy & Curious

Instagram: @Sexishh

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Sexpert/

How to Keep your Long Distance Relationship Spicy

How to keep Your Long distance relationship Spicy

Although my boyfriend and I live together there are times where we are apart for a couple of weeks due to me visiting my family back in New York. Not only does the distance make the heart grow fonder but our sex drive also grows fonder. All of a sudden when we’re apart, everything reminds me of his sexy body and his sexy dick.

For some, long distance for a relationship can be scary especially if it’s a new relationship. In the beginning, I had all these worries that he’d forget about me and he wouldn’t be thinking about me while he lived his separate busy life. It wasn’t until we started to do things to keep the flame going even from a far. Suddenly, that worry is nonexistent. Our relationship has grown stronger from being a part and reuniting in person feels so much better.

Making an effort doesn’t have to feel like a drag, it can be fun and sexy! Here are 10 things to do with your partner to keep things sexy from a far.

– Send Good Morning texts

Good Morning texts are the best. It shows your partner you’re thinking about them as soon as you get up. If you know your man loves to masturbate in the morning, send him a dirty text hoping that he gets a great nut in before he starts his day. If he doesn’t masturbate, give him a reason to. He’ll love that you care about his sexual needs.

– Let him know you’re thinking about him

I spend a lot of time with my boyfriend so even when we’re apart I’m still reminded of him in everything I do. Either it be the food I’m eating, something I see on TV, or just a random memory of him pops up. If it makes me laugh to myself, I love texting or calling him to let him know what did that. My partner loves to know I’m thinking about him even on my busiest days. The next time you see that thing that made you smile, let him know!

-Movie night

If you and your partner watch movies regularly, that doesn’t have to stop just because you guys are far from each other. There’s plenty of streaming services where you can share a link with your partner and watch a movie at the same time in real time! The next time you do movie night, set your Facetime call somewhere so that your partner can see you. Then place it on mute. Now you can watch a movie together and still see your partners reaction. It’s the next best thing to watching a movie together in person.

-Start a challenge

Distance is great for the relationship because it gives you time to reflect on yourself and remind you that you still have a life without your partner. It’s great to have goals with each other but having a strong foundation with yourself is crucial to a successful relationship. To show that you can be successful without your partner, start a challenge with each other. For example, it could be a fitness challenge. Challenge each other on who’s going to be more fit the next time you see each other. This will force you to focus on yourself and make sure you win!

-Use long distance sex toys

YES, there are long distance sex toys! It’s not like Player One technology where you’ll be able to feel every touch of his but it’s better than nothing. Make phone sex more intense with sex toys you and your partner can control with an app. The idea of your partner controlling your pleasure plays with the sub/dom dynamic which can be real sexy. Using long distance toys allows you to still feel connected with your partner even when you’re far apart.

Moxie by We- Vibe App Controlled (Use code SEXISH for 10% off)
Lovense is known for its app controlled sex toys that works for long distance relationships
We-Vibe Ditto I love We-Vibe toys because you can connect it to your music so that the vibrations vibrate to the beat

-Clone a Willy

Do you love your partner’s dick so much you wish you could take it everywhere? Well, Clone a Willy just made that possible! With Clone a Willy, you’re able to get all your favorite details on his dick on to your dildo. Take it everywhere you go, just make sure to hide it from the kids when visiting family.

– Try a Phone call instead

Remember how good 2 hour phone calls made you feel? Do that again!

Whenever I want to have a long conversation, I’ll do a phone call instead of a Facetime call. Sometimes when I’m on Facetime, I get distracted by how I look instead of focusing on what he’s saying. Giving him all your attention will make him feel special. Also, phone calls are just so much more romantic and I’m a sucker for romance.

– Think of ways you can surprise him for when you see him next

It’s finally the day you’re going to see each other. While you are enough, getting something extra will be even better. I love surprising my man with something when I see him. Either it be a food that he’s been craving or surprising him with something I saw that reminded me of him. Before seeing him, let him know you have a surprise. This will have him anticipating you even more.

Check out my Valentines’s day idea post to get more tips on how you can surprise your man! 

As you can see there are plenty of things you can do to keep your long distance relationship interesting and spicy. Don’t let the distance thing be a reason why you shouldn’t be with someone that could potentially be your one. As long as you both want it to work, there will be nothing that will get in the way of it!

I hope this helps on your current or next long distance relationship. Let me know if you do anything else to keep your relationship spicy!

Stay Sexy & Curious!

Instagram: @SEXISHH

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Check out My Favorite Sex Shops to buy your sex toys to get you started on your sexual journey! 

Sexpert/

I Wish I knew This Before Exploring My Sexuality

What I wish I knew before exploring my sexuality: (Some but not all)

– I am worth it. I am enough.

– When you’re young it’s easy for older people to take advantage of your naivety.

– Boundaries.

– Sex Toys.

– You can have amazing sex with someone you love.

I started exploring my sexuality after my relationship with someone for 3 years. In those 3 years, the sex was pretty regular. We were young just pumping around. After that, I became dick crazy. I loved the new attention I was getting from men. I knew I was cute, but I didn’t know I was hot like that.

I remember the first time someone asked for my number at the club. He was on the lower level and I was above him. He handed me his phone and I put my number in with no hesitation. No hello or no “what’s your name?”. I just gave him my number. Don’t worry, nothing happened. I learned shortly after that you probably should learn someone’s name before giving out your number.

At the time, I didn’t feel bad because I was living in the moment. I was living my younger 20s like how one should. I was young and reckless doing it for the stories. When the fun ended which was right around COVID, I had so much time to myself to think about who I was and what I’ve been doing these past couple of years. It didn’t take long for the anxiety to kick in because I didn’t know who I was.

Most of my insecurities started when I began to explore my sexuality. Which is normal when you’re put into new situations and you don’t know how to handle it. Exploring your sexuality is a journey and not all journey’s are easy. We have to go through shit to learn. It’s impossible to have learned what I learned without going through it first.

With that being said, while there are things you have to experience, there are also things in life you should always know and remember when you are going through your sexual journey.

I think often times as women we can get carried away with good dick or our first love that we forget to prioritize ourselves. Below are things I wish someone had reminded me along my journey so that I wouldn’t be stuck with the feelings of insecurity.

I AM WORTH IT. I AM ENOUGH.

Before going on my sexual journey, I wish I had always thought I was enough. There were so many times when I blamed myself for a guy not wanting to go on a date with me or be my boyfriend. I would think there was something wrong with me.

Now, I know it’s not my fault and it never was. In therapy we learn there is “my” business, the other person’s business and then the universe’s business. When you are going into someone else’s business, you no longer have control. People’s actions are always a reflection of themselves, not of you. If he doesn’t want to be in a relationship, then he’s going through his own internal issues. You can’t control how someone feels. It’s up to you to know your own worth and if you want to put up with it.

WHEN YOU’RE YOUNG, IT’S EASY FOR OLDER PEOPLE TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU.

I have always been into older men. It started with 3 years older to 8 years older to 19 years older and then 30 years older. I don’t care what anyone says, I genuinely liked all the men I was with. It had nothing to do with financial reasons. I think most of the men I was with knew this about me and took advantage of it.

Since I was naive, I believed the things that were being told to me. I even lowered my boundaries because I figured they knew more than me. It wasn’t until I started to blame myself for letting the shit happen to me that I realized I’m not the one to blame.

It’s not my fault I didn’t know any better because of my age. I haven’t lived as long as them to know what they were doing to me. I was dealing with older men who’s been through life. Hell, he was even alive during Martin Luther King. It’s hard to believe that they didn’t know what they were doing.

So when dealing with older men or anyone, be aware of how they treat you. If you think something is off and unusual it’s most likely that they’re stepping over your boundaries and you need to check with yourself. Don’t let the oldies mess with you!!!

BOUNDARIES

That leads me to boundaries. When people think of boundaries they think of it as some rigid thing. It’s all or nothing. It doesn’t have to be. Sometimes you don’t even know you need to set boundaries until something bothers you. When I was hoeing around (having sex with consent and it was my choice), there were times when I felt like I had to be a people pleaser. It’s going back to not thinking I was enough therefore I felt like I had to compensate for it. I remember there were times people said things to me that I didn’t like and even agreed with them because I was afraid they wouldn’t like me anymore. FUCK THAT.

You must have boundaries in all your relationships even the situationships! I don’t care if you guys are only fucking on the weekends, there must be boundaries set up. When you don’t set boundaries for yourself you’ll end up feeling regretful and it’s not a great feeling. I wish I had set boundaries for myself because then I probably wouldn’t have stayed in the toxic relationships for so long.

SEX TOYS

The time I spent worrying about people who didn’t care about me, I should’ve been fucking myself. I should’ve been using all that money to commute for dick on sex toys. I wish I knew to discover my body by myself first before trying to do it with people who didn’t respect me. You know what sex toys can’t do that humans do all the time? Disrespect you- unless the battery dies on you before you cum.

YOU CAN HAVE SEX WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE

When I was young and reckless, I didn’t think being in a relationship was possible for me. I even started to get comfortable with the idea that I was going to be single for life. I figured it can’t be too bad. I’ll just get a bunch of dogs who love me and I’ll live happily ever after.

Young me always believed that the best dick came from strangers who didn’t want to get to know you. I told you I was naive! Oh young Theresa, if only you knew there was gonna be a hot sexy man who respects and who loves you for you in LA.

I wish I knew I was capable of falling in love and having good sex at the same time. If anything, it is much better when you are in love! There’s no better feeling than doing the things you love with someone who is just obsessed with you. It removes the anxiety of constantly overthinking about what he might be thinking about you.

I hope when you’re on you sex journey you think about these things. You are worth it and don’t let anyone make you feel you aren’t. You are beautiful, you are a human, you have goals, you have dreams, you have a personality. Don’t let ANYONE take that away from you.

What do you wish you knew before exploring your sexuality?

Stay Sexy & Curious!

Instagram: @Sexishh

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That's What She Said/

What I’ve Done for the Dick

Sometimes all we need is a GOOD dick down to get our mood right and we don’t necessarily need to be in a relationship to get this. This is what a Fuck- Buddy is for.

We’ve all been there where we had a fuck-buddy and we thought we had feelings for them and then realized it was just their dick mesmerizing us. Let’s face it, It’s hard to come across good, hot, nasty sex especially if we’re not in a relationship. When you’re looking for one, it seems like all hook ups suck. It’s an endless pit of men who don’t understand your body. It’s frustrating and can result in you abusing your vibrator.

It’s not until you’ve hit the jackpot and you’ve found someone who doesn’t want to be in a relationship and just wants to fuck the shit out of you. It’s hard to let go of good dick when you’ve got it which is why we’ll do the craziest things for it. Remember back in 2017 when celebrities and people were making raps about what they’d do for the dick?

Check out my rap on What I’ve Done For the Dick

I was actually very proud of my rap that I came up with.

“What have I done for the Dick?

I drove 10 miles for the Dick,

I skip red lights for the Dick,

get caught for the Dick,

Po po, I’m just trying to get some Dickkkk”

I have the craziest stories from when I was dick crazy. I was wasting money for the dick, I was leaving functions early for the dick, I was calling out of work for the dick. I almost have done it all. While I can sit here and regret all of the things I’ve done, I just laugh. I laugh about how young and carefree I was to live in those moments. Sometimes I even wish I can bring some of those crazy traits back. I miss crazy Theresa.

They were some of my favorite and worst moments of my life. It’s probably why I’m in therapy now. With that being said, it was part of my life and I learned so much from it. I’ve learned to raise my standards and respect myself more. I would never go through the things I’ve gone through in the past again. I also have the best boyfriend now in which I can do all the nasty things with… But, I digress.

Here are three moments during my HOE life when I thought “Wow, I’m really here just for dick. “

I used a used towel for the Dick

During my hoe days, I used to hook up with starving artists which meant that they were barely making rent with their 500 side hustles. I’m not knocking them, it’s just part of the hustle, which I respect!

What I don’t respect is a grown man having only one towel to share. I don’t care what situation you are in, if you are a grown man, please own at least 3-4 towels. What happens when you have to wash the dirty towel? Are you going to wait until the towel is washed to take a shower?

Unfortunately, the dick was so good and I was the one who had to use the wet towel. After a SWEATY NASTY SEX session, I couldn’t wait to take a nice cool shower. When it was my turn to shower, I asked where my towel was. He said it was the only towel he had because the other one was dirty.

I ended up having to dry myself with a wet towel he used to dry his 5’10 body off. If only the session ended with us knocking out and me racing to the shower first in the morning. URGH!

LESSON: At the time, I thought it was okay since he wasn’t my boyfriend. I had no intentions of having a long term relationship with him, but NO. I no longer will do this for anyone. If you don’t have a towel for me especially if you knew I was coming over, it’s done. I don’t care how good the dick is, I’m too grown to be using wet towels. I’ll wait until you find time to wash your towels for me to come over.

I slept on an Air Mattress for the Dick

When hooking up with someone, sometimes the reason for it can be more than one. In this case, it was for dick and a place to sleep. No shame! I lived far and if I was going to sleep with someone it was going to be with someone familiar. This might have been my ultimate low when I found myself in the middle of the night on the floor because the air mattress had deflated on my side. 1. I was sleeping on an air mattress. Again, a grown man. I have much higher standards now and will only sleep with someone who has a minimum of a Queen size bed and has a bed frame. 2. There was a hole in the air mattress. This was clearly not new news for him since this is what he sleeps on. I wish I was warned before this happened or at least be told to sleep on the side that didn’t have the hole in it! I can’t believe I slept on a deflated air mattress. The dick wasn’t even that good!

LESSON: It’s not worth sleeping on an air mattress. Save your money to get you LYFTS back home.

I drove miles for the Dick

When I had my own car, I was driving everywhere and that included going back and forth for dick even if that meant driving miles for it. I had this one fuck buddy who lived about 40 minutes away driving and almost 2 hrs to get there with public transportation. This dick was so good that I was using up m savings just to see him.

LESSON: Don’t spend all your money on someone who wants to see you. Ask them to contribute especially if you’re the one making the trip. Also, if he’s your dealer and you’re fucking him and you’re still not getting a discount, shieeettttt leave his ASS NOW!!

I’m a HOE advocate which means I support women who sleep with people for pleasure.

They don’t necessarily need to be in a relationship as long as there’s consent and it was their choice from the beginning. We shouldn’t be shamed for something men have been doing this entire time. Live your life the way you want to. Just remember what you are worth and never let anyone take that away from you no matter how good the dick is!

What was the most you’ve done for the Dick? Comment below

Stay Sexy & Curious!

Instagram @Sexishh

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